THE LIFE AND TIMES OF THE SHANTIES OF BRYNIESHA THE SCORPION QUEEN a tragedy in reverse, so a
Directed by Jess Thomas
Featuring Jessica Risco & Nima Slone
CAST OF CHARACTERS:
SANDY – any gender / any age / any race / a writer and director and creative chief of a sunken cruise liner
SUNNY – female / any age / any race / top ingénue on aforementioned cruise liner
SETTING:
The deserted beach of a remote island
SCENE 12
The sounds of waves crashing on a deserted beach.
Music fades in quickly. Driving, intense, confrontational.
The sounds of a struggle onstage.
The music reaches a climax, as does the onstage attack.
Lights up abruptly.
SANDY stands over the dead body of SUNNY. She holds a bloody club.
SANDY
Yes. YAAAAS. I DID IT! I finally did it!!
(warrior banshee wail)
(drops to knees, over Sunny)
Thank you.
(maniacal laugh)
There! Do you see?! Can you see?!
(long beat)
Hello?
(long beat, look around)
Am I alone, now? Did – uhh -- did everyone leave?
(beat)
Shit.
TRANSITION
SCENE 11
SUNNY remains onstage in the same position, a BLANKET has been placed over her. At rise, she’s alone, trying to sleep as she shivers in the wind.
SANDY crawls on stealthily with the club and a knife in her mouth.
Sandy stands slowly, hesitates for a moment, looks offstage as if she’s being encouraged, then continues her ominous advance toward Sunny.
She makes a sound, and Sunny darts up from her slumber. Sandy hits the deck.
SUNNY
Hello?
Nothing, she cautiously goes back under the blanket.
Sandy coughs. Sunny darts back up.
SUNNY
WHO’S THERE?!
Nothing. Sunny gets up to inspect.
SUNNY
Sandy? Is that you? I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to – I mean – I wanted – uhh, Sandy? Are you there?
SANDY
(makes a distant bird sound)
SUNNY
Was that a bird?
Sandy leaps to her feet, brandishing the knife.
SUNNY
Sandy! How long have you been there?
SANDY
Long enough to hear your bullshit apology! (bad mimic) I’m sorry – I mean – it just – EUUUGH!
SUNNY
Put down the knife.
SANDY
Why?
SUNNY
Because it’s me. You don’t wanna do this. Why would you? After everything we’ve been through--?
SANDY
Everything I’ve been through, Sunny! Me! Alone! Betrayed! Destroyed! Reborn.
SUNNY
This has been hard on both of us.
SANDY
Hard is only four fucking letters! We shouldn’t have survived, Sunny! Any of it!
SUNNY
But we did. Together.
SANDY
Why did you do it?! Just turn on me? Turn on us, the play?! You knew how much it meant / to me.
SUNNY
I know, I was trying to help--
SANDY
YOU’RE FUCKING KIDDING ME!
SUNNY
I wanted to make a clean break, so we could work on ourselves, just for a while. Just until we got rescued.
SANDY
What if the world ended? What if that’s what caused the accident? What if we’re the last two?
SUNNY
What’s the difference? To us, right now? What is the difference?
SANDY
(no response)
SUNNY
Put down the knife.
SANDY
We’re gonna die out here.
SUNNY
No, we’re not. Put it down.
SANDY
I can’t live like this. Not anymore. Look. There’s nothing in every direction. No one’s coming. I must rebuild anew.
SUNNY
Don’t talk like that. We -- have each other.
SANDY
No! We don’t! Not anymore!
SUNNY
You’re scaring me.
SANDY
Admit it, you were gonna do it if I didn’t. ADMIT IT, SUNNY!
SUNNY
You sound like Moses.
SANDY
So you can hear him, too?
SUNNY
Sandy…
SANDY
I needed someone to talk to!
SUNNY
Talk to me. Please.
SANDY
You don’t understand.
SUNNY
Sandy, Moses isn’t even—
SANDY
YAAAAAAA!
She tosses the knife clumsily. It is lobbed clear of Sunny.
SANDY
Crap.
SUNNY
Are you insane?!
SANDY
Probably!
Sunny goes for the knife, lobs it back, harmlessly.
The CLUB is between them. They both dive for it, struggle.
SUNNY
You need me Sandy. I’m the only thing keeping you from—
Sandy breaks away with the Club, stands and raises it over her head, prepared to deliver the killing blow.
Lights out.
We hear the first blow.
TRANSITION
SCENE 10
Sandy sits in the spotlight down stage right.
SANDY
What do you mean, be the “first to strike”? What does that mean?
She wouldn’t do that. I know her, she would never—
How can one truly exist when they’re trapped with the past?
No, I haven’t done everything. There’s still more I can—
Making it easier doesn’t make it right, Moses. I’m not even supposed to be talking to you. If Sunny found out—
No, no, I didn’t mean it like—
No, it’s wrong.
No, there is a law. Natural law.
Survival of the fittest.
Food for one.
Being forced to witness my own heartbreak over and over and over again.
Flourish. Accept the animal.
It was a threat. Not like the other times. It was real. You heard it, right?
I must survive. I must rebuild.
Thanks, Moses.
I love you, too.
(laughs)
Don’t be creepy.
TRANSITION
SCENE 9
SUNNY paces back and forth, mid-performance.
SANDY crouches downstage, observing.
SUNNY
The scorpions came back again last night. More this time. They came to a rest at my toes, as if something was repelling them. They clawed at me, I could hear the little snaps, but they never touched the skin. For I have become one with the tide. My world is theirs. And theirs mine own.
SANDY
No, I don’t like that.
SUNNY
What, now?
SANDY
“And theirs mine own”. I don’t want to come across as pretentious.
SUNNY
To who?!
SANDY
Don’t – please don’t do that. Not now. Not when we’re this close.
SUNNY
I’m sorry, but the whole process has sort of –
SANDY
Sort of what?
SUNNY
Let me finish. Can I / finish?
SANDY
I’m letting you finish! Sort of what? Sort of what, Sunny?! What has the process “sort of” done?!
SUNNY
Lost its appeal. I mean, come on. Give me a single reason why this benefits or enriches or helps anything?
SANDY
We’ve been over this.
SUNNY
I’m sorry, it feels pointless when we have to spend half the day scrounging for food.
SANDY
Moses said we need to / embrace our imagination.
SUNNY
Wait, you’re still talking with Moses?! Didn’t we agree you wouldn’t talk to Moses anymore??
SANDY
It’s been helpful, talking, now that we’re—
SUNNY
No, Sandy. You promised. You can’t betray my trust.
SANDY
You can’t tell me to do that!
You can’t make me feel guilty for discussing my problems with the only other person on this fucking weird island!
SUNNY
Moses is not a person.
SANDY
I know that. You think I don’t know that?! I’m not crazy, I’m fucking lonely! And up to here with the logistics of this performance—
SUNNY
And it’s still all about the play! Not about survival or relationships, but the fake fucking play!
SANDY
The play is all we have.
SUNNY
Maybe for you…
SANDY
Sunny, it’s our legacy.
SUNNY
Listen to yourself.
SANDY
It will be recorded in the trees, the dunes, the shrubberies—
SUNNY
You’re delusional!
SANDY
Am I?! Am I delusional for placing faith in a higher form of nature? While entombed within its benevolent loins?!
SUNNY
Is that a line from the play?
SANDY
Can’t you see it’s all the same, now?! Life is art! We have created perpetual motion!
SUNNY
Can we just breathe for a moment?
They do a coordinated breathing exercise. The tension eases.
SUNNY
It doesn’t feel right, anymore. We’re feeding each other this bogus narrative to stave off heat stroke and starvation, when we should be focusing on getting off this fucking shitpile of shit!
SANDY
(breath)
This may be silly, HAHA YEAH I GET IT, but don’t, please don’t, burn away the last shred of fantasy we have left.
SUNNY
Oh, well I’m not sure about you, but I can fantasize all I want. I do it all day. I fantasize about all my friends back home. My family. Drugs. Parties. Track lighting. My husband. Everything.
SANDY
But not me.
SUNNY
Oh, I do. I have fantasies about you. About life without you. Some goddamn peace and quiet.
SANDY
If I didn’t know better, that would sound like a threat.
(beat)
Can we take it back to “one with the tide”? Try and get to the truth of the matter?
SUNNY
Yeah, I can do that.
For I am one with the tide. I carry useless, slimy sea junk on my shoulders. Mingling with garbage. Humoring the irrational.
SANDY
No, that doesn’t work for me.
SUNNY
Its devised theater, right? We merge our experiences. I think this is a good new direction. Let’s just say what we really think. Finally.
SANDY
You asked me to be more honest! I’m trying to be more honest! Where is this coming from?
SUNNY
This whole thing is stupid.
SANDY
You are.
SUNNY
Okay, I’m done. Find your own beach. I’m done. The show’s over. I fucking quit.
She storms off.
SANDY
We’re not finished! Sunny?! SUNNY??!!
Sunny doesn’t respond.
Sandy slowly starts a maniacal laugh, borne of destruction and despair.
TRANSITION
SCENE 8
SUNNY sits in the spotlight down right.
SUNNY
Hey. Sorry if it’s a bad time.
I know, but it’s getting worse. I’m starting to think she’s lost it completely.
It’s my fault, I know that.
No, it is.
Of course she doesn’t. How would that make me look if she knew I was talking to you? I’m not the crazy one. I just need – a sounding board every once in a while.
But there needs to be some sort of closure. Or we’re going to tear each other apart.
She will hang on as long as she can. It’s up to someone else.
Maybe if we spent some time apart, a hard cut, radio silence, then maybe…
She won’t do that. She would never--
She has lost herself in the stress. She is no longer responsible for her actions.
What are you saying?
No, no. It’s not that. It’s the play, it seemed like a good idea before. But things were different, then. Now, it’s just sad. She can boast all she wants that we’re performing for Mother Nature, seeking approval of the disenfranchised corners of the globe, but the fact of the matter is, we’re falling apart over a play that no one will ever see.
Yes, even it we get rescued. I mean, who the hell would pay for The Shanties of Bryniesha (pronounced BRY-NEESHA) the Scorpion Fucker or whatever she wants to call it this week? That’s student improv collective shit, right there. I was a cruise performer, we’re in a league of our own.
I just feel my solution is better. Sever all contact for a while, fend for ourselves, re-discover ourselves. A trial separation – no, that implies reconciliation. But I mean, maybe, if we got off this beach—
No. Stop saying that. I’ll just – I’ll have to be the bad guy. But – it’s for the best, especially if we stay here. Yeah.
Agreed.
Thanks Moses. I should get some sleep. I’ll do it tomorrow.
(giggles)
You’re such a perv.
TRANSITION
SCENE 7
SUNNY stretches, does vocal warm-ups.
SANDY enters in a hurry.
SANDY
Sorry, babe, I got turned around in the woods.
They kiss. Sandy goes for the prop box.
SANDY
What did you wanna work today? The confessional? The dinner scene?
SUNNY
Um. Hi.
SANDY
Hi.
SUNNY
Nice to see you.
SANDY
Huh?
SUNNY
You were gone for five hours.
SANDY
Yeah? It’s a big island.
SUNNY
I get nervous when you disappear like that.
SANDY
I was free-associating repressed memories for Bryniesha the MerDame and I got turned around. What’s the problem?
SUNNY
You were never late on the cruise ship. You were the clicky click thing that kept us together. What is that thing?
SANDY
Metronome.
SUNNY
No, not the stadium. The clicky thing.
SANDY
The clicky thing that keeps perfect time for musicians?
SUNNY
Yeah, that thing.
SANDY
It’s called a Ticky Tick.
SUNNY
Ah. Yes. Well, my point is, you’ve been acting -- different.
SANDY
I’m inspired. By creation. By companionship. Something’s happening here. With this. I can taste it, you know. Can you taste it?
SUNNY
You’ve been wandering off. Into the woods.
SANDY
I like walking. It helps the creative process. Who dubbed you interrogator Sondheim?
SUNNY
You know why.
SANDY
(beat)
Yeah. But you don’t need to worry.